Letting People Go (My Personal Perspective))

I've struggle when someone decides he/she doesn't want me to be part of their life anymore (or he/she removes his/herself from mine). 

I'm definitely not a perfect person. I have my flaws and have made mistakes. I have and will accept if and when I'm in the wrong. 

I have a hard time letting people go! However, God revealed to me that whether or not I understand why someone isn't in my life anymore, I need to let go. I can't control others decisions. I won't always know why. I just have to trust that their new direction or next chapter may not include me. I may just be a "seasonal" friend" in their life. Maybe that person has a situation going on God doesn't want me to be a part of. Whatever, the reason when people are no longer in my life I need to let go and let God...and be ok with it.

The reasons could go on and I have learned to accept when change happens. I have learned people will do they what they want to do, with or without you. 

I hold people close. I do my best to make the most of the friendships and relationships in my life. Again, nothing is ever perfect, but the effort and care is very much applied. So whatever happens, it can be said that at least good happened and I or we did try our best to make the most of our time together. Some I've even called my family and when they're no longer in my life, I'm sometimes conflicted and sadden. *Unless, I have seen or understand why their time in my life has come to an "end".

I will admit, I've cut people off or made it clear they need to move on and away from me. Usually, because there was a negative impact made and I don't need that drama or negativity in my life. However, to understand my point from this writing, I don't understand letting go someone that loves, cares, and gives so much and then just decide that you don't need that person anymore. I tend to think, "What did I do wrong or what's wrong with me?" I really would have a hard time understanding someone choosing to not be around anymore. All communication would just get cut off, moreso from their side. 

Sometimes people choose to remove themselves because they grow tired or long for something different. Sometimes it could be a maturity thing and maybe their growth/journey doesn't include certain people. I have even figured out that someone could be hiding something and/or doesn't want to be held accountable. People want to do what they do and not have others get in their way. So, they push away. These and other reasons are just few of many people cut you off. 

*Everyone can't be your friend. Every person is not your friend. However, who ever it is and for whatever reason they're in your life, you still been to be who God called you to be. Your presence in their life could be brief or a life time. I will love, care, and pray for me whoever is in my life despite not knowing how long they're in it. I'm that friend. I'm that person who is going to give it my best and all when necessary because I treat others how I want to be treats. So, if the time comes when we don't see each other anymore and one of us moves on, then it can be said that it was nice while it lasted.

This could be continued as I know much discussion can come from this topic.

Cutting Them Off

 Idk.  Lots of people are talking about cutting off folks and moving on. I get that when you're around toxic people. I get it when there are individuals or groups that are not good for you. Everyone isn't your friend. Someone or many could be using or abusing you.   However, pulling yourself away so you don't have to be held accountable or "have people in your business" isn't a reason to cut people off.  Some people pull away because of someone else. Some cut off because they rather be alone and do their own thing.   There are just so many posts about changing it up and being by yourself. However, then we have people struggling mentally and feeling alone. *Please note, I know there are other reasons for that as well.   What happen to keeping a solid group of friends in your life? What's going on that so many have to cut ties and move on from people after so many years?   Just seems like there is so much hurt or misunderstanding. Also, seems like some people don't want to have real friends, just those who are for entertainment and puff them up. They don't want to have accountability, but want accolades and approval whether right or wrong. If you got poeple who only know so much about you, then limited access or knowledge means you can do whatever, whenever without muchsay so.   This is just one perspective. This isn't towards anyone specific and again, I do get that what I'm talking about is circumstantial. It doesn't necessarily apply to those choosing to make this year about starting fresh being around new people. Sometimes, you have to let go of people. Sometimes, you're meant to move on and forward. I've done it, so I do know. It's hard and sometimes it hurts or it's freeing and you're ok about it.   However, if you're blessed with good people in your life  and hopefully ones that care about you, don't let anyone or anything pull you away from them. If something is an issue, work to resolve it and reconcile. It's possible. God knows who's needed in your life and vice verse. Do think carefully about your support system and those that should be a part of it.

Breaking Down Walls

 Thoughts from an empath....

Sometimes...when trying to knock down others walls there's hesitation, pain/hurt, and complications on both sides. It's not always easy and it's not always possible.

I'm referring to people who build up walls that need to be broken so reaching out or getting through to can be possible. Sometimes, walls are built out of fear and despair and that person is trying to protect his or herself, when really it is preventing from healing, restoration, and love. 

Walls are hard and are put up as such so no one can get throughor over! They don't come down easily and take time to break down. So, patience is needed on both sides. Sometimes, the one trying to get through gets tired and may need a break. Still caring...still trying. 

Personally, I'm just tired in some cases. Not tired of trying to get through or be a friend. I'm tired because it is hard and feeling like, "what more can I do?" How much longer will it take? Am I not trying hard enough? Do I just leave this person be? Maybe, I'm not the one supposed to break their wall(s) down? Do I care too much? 

I guess it'll be hard either way...to keep trying or to leave it alone. 

I'm still a good friend. I don't give up easily on people, but I'm learning when to step aside and let things be. I'm accepting that sometimes people decide to hide from or block you. I'm alright with knowing I did what I could, that it was my best. 

Please note, I'm not talking about anyone specific. I got into a conversation about relationships and friendships and just sharing some of my thoughts from it. Yea, it is personal, relatable, and I can think of few in my life I've been connected with where this has happened. However, it doesn't matter because whether is has been someone past, present, or maybe in the future I know that breaking down someone's walls if meant to do so, isn't something that will not happen overnight. The tools needed have to be good, strong ones. God will have to provide the strength and patience on for the breaker, as the builder of that wall slowly stops and hopefully will finally let it fall. 

The Last 6 Weeks

As I try to go to sleep, I think about how for the last 6 weeks I've been going to the chemo center with my mom in-law. Her treatment is suppose to be 12 weeks so we're over half way through it.

It's definitely a reality check! She's doing as best as we all can hope, but others I see there have been coming for a long time or have a long way to go with their treatments.

I overhear their struggles or walk by and see some who have no one at their side. Yea their families and friends could be busy, but I couldn't imagine going thru that by myself. Some look so weak and/tired. Others are a little more uplifted, but you can still see their pain. It's a battle and journey for them to be cancer free. They are fighters nonetheless.

Being there with my mom-in-law, I believe helps keep her spirit up and have someone to confide in. We talk and reminisce almost the whole time.

Why am I writing this...well it's to remind you that life is precious, unpredictable, and definitely tomorrow is not promised. Also remember those who get up fighting for their lives everyday.

We complain and vent about meaningless matters, when another just wants to feel better physically and beat the odds. We have to remind ourselves that others are struggling like we are...even much "worse".

Last, I got strong moms in my life. My mom had a stroke and she could be speechless and physically inept. However she pulled through and can't stop talking and moving around, lol, but I rather hear her than to wonder what she would say.

My mom-in-law is a trooper. This isn't easy for her, but she keeps going. I told her she will be stronger than ever after it's over. Her chances are great and she'll be alright.

That's enough from me. Keep my family in your prayers. Remember to pray for the sick. Encourage them as well.

An Artistic Perspective

No one had to believe in me, but certain ones did. I did have people question, but no one ever told me to quit or give up.

Being an artist is not an easy thing especially if you pursue a career in being one.

People can be very critical and doubting. Other artists can be very competitive or unnecessarily comparative.

So really it's all about my own passion and perspective that keeps my going in what I love to do. This isn't just a hobby and it is not just my work...my creativity, my artistic gifts, my aesthetic as an artist is who I am.

While I do expect and accept critique, I know everyone will not be pleased and/or see what I see. That's fine. I take in what will allow me to better my work.

I enjoy what I do. Can't see myself doing anything that isn't related to art. I love it so much. Since I could write with a pencil and color with a crayon, I have always been interested art: drawing, painting, crafts, digital art, different aspects of designing, etc.

I can't wait to learn more so I can do more. I have my days when I'm not totally confident, but I got my support esp from my family who tell me to get it together and keep moving forward.

My parents didn't know what to expect as first, but they have always been encouraging and supplied me with plenty of art materials to keep me busy and productive. Now they see it has paid off. Then my husband fully has my back and now I have an overflowing art space that still keeps me busy. Thanks all the art supplies he gets me. ;)

I'll end with this...do what you love. Take whatever critique is necessary, but don't let it get you down.  Be motivated to do your best and do what works for you. If something doesn't work out as planned, either go back to the drawing board and try again...or try something else. Nothing wrong with trying something new. Be passionate about your work and seek to have it benefit others. Trust God with the gifts and talents He's given you. You'll find satisfaction in knowing you're doing what is meant for you to do.

To My Business Owners/Bosses Out There

Obviously I'm still working hard to get out there myself, but let me share this with you and feel free to share back. (In relation to business and growing one)

You won't  "Blow Up", "Get Big", or have major support in one day! It takes time, along with diligence.

You have to get up each day, doing more than the day before to get where you want to be...to get what you want to have.

Sometimes that means you have to get out of your comfort zone-Talk to new people, going out to new places, and exploring different avenues in relation to your business. Make connections! Brand yourself correctly.

This is mostly common knowledge and just the general things to consider.

I just want to encourage real, hard-working, driven, and passionate business owners/entrepreneurs to not be scared to try. If you pursue something you're good at, have sufficient knowledge of, and feel good about it, then see if you can make it work...make it happen. Also know it is ok if you fail or don't get as far the first time around...maybe you're meant to do something else.

Just don't try to copy something or someone else you really have no interest in. Too many want to mimic and get into something just for the benefits...then fall flat because the motive was wrong.
There doesn't need to be several of the same businesses and no one really stands out because there isn't any authenticity ...nothing genuine.

Each business and its brand has a personal story behind. If you don't have one, then it is probably not for you to do. Why do tjis specific business? What will make you stand out? What will cause people to pay attention and support you?

Being in business is NOT for everyone. There's nothing wrong with having a boss. We need bosses and workers. You may not possess the qualities of a "boss" and shouldn't force yourself into the position  of being one. However if you see yourself being a boss (to others or just for yourself), be ready to work 3 times as hard, longer hours, and learn more than what you think you already know.

That's all for now...

Untitled...

After a conversation with my friends, some of it about us growing up and what we did and how we were...I have come to really appreciate how I am...how I turned out.

This isn't me bragging or implying I'm better than anyone else. I never got into much trouble, ran in the streets, or hung out around negative influences. There's things I didn't do that would be considered bad or make my parents worry about me.

However I have made many poor decisions, trusted people I shouldn't have, and was naive in many ways. Being known as good, sweet, and sensitive, didn't mean I am without my flaws and faults. As we were all talking, I just kept thinking how I could have done some things differently. I can't compared to what others have done, but I've sinned and did things that disappointed God and others in my life.

I have struggled with things internally and that would affect how I have treated people and acted outwardly. My actions and behavior have not always been right and I had to suffered consequences and learn from my mistakes.

I thank for God keeping me and showing me areas of my life that I had to work on and still need to work on.

Just thinking back at what I have done and where I am now, I'm in a good place. I'm not where I want to be, but I'm growing, learning, and getting better. I'm becoming more of who God wants me to be. He's forgiven me and continues to have mercy on me. I'm thankful for what I have and all God has done in my life.